Deadpool (video game)
Hell yeah! Finally, my very own video game: Deadpool! You read right! High Moon Studios - the masterminds behind Robert Ludlum's The Bourne Conspiracy, the Transformers War, and Fall of Cybertron videogames - was hired by yours truly to create the most awesome video game yet (until they come out with a Deadpool 2, but one step at a time, here)! It will be published by Activision & Marvel Entertainment, the same guys who published other Marvel-related games. The game is out right now ! MARVELous!!!! What kinda game will it be? Let's see; Daniel Way is writing the script (the same Daniel Way that writes most of my comics and adventures); Nolan North is voicing me (the same Nolan North that voices most of my appearances); and it will be a third-person action game with bouncing EVERYTHING! (If you catch my drift. Wink!) So, in short, get ready to play a very, VERY, badass video game. Features *Third-person shooter/Hack and Slash *(Yes, I know I'm in a video game... don't make me look like an idiot.) *Unlock weapon upgrades with achievement points. Guns! Knives! Explosives! Rubber duckies! *Unlock different combos by switching fighting styles (I know them all) and utilizing different weapons ("utilizing"? Who the hell is writing this?) * MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!! Cast (but really, I'm the only one needed right?) These are the OTHER people in MY video game. *Deadpool (That's me!) *Chance White (Some douche I had to kill) *Wolverine (Over powered butthole who likes to stab me) *Psylocke (Hot Chick) *Domino (My Sexy on/off Girl. She may tell you otherwise but she's lying) *Cable (My best friend!) *Nolan North (He's my voice actor!) *Arclight (I think she's a dude) *Blockbuster (The big dumb muscle cliché guy) *Mr. Sinister (You know, the big bad trying to halt my progress?) *Vertigo (Lamest. powers. EVER!) *Death (My girl) *Rogue (I'd like to have skin contact with that southern belle!) *Magneto (Though he never appeared in my game, he is mentioned by Cable) *Spider-Man (Same as Magneto, except right at the beginning of the game) DP AL 625.jpg|Arclight. Deadp2.jpg|Psylocke. Deadp1.jpg|Mr. Sinister. Block2.jpg|Vertigo. Block1.jpg|Blockbuster. tumblr_mna1mlG9o11rz99rso1_1280.jpg|Wolverine. rogue_deadpool_thumb.jpg|Rogue. Deadpool Domino.jpg|Domino. SYNOPSIS My boss games starts with me getting some voice mail from Wolverine and Domino and finally High Moon Studios, but they say i can't have my own video game! But I managed to persuade them to change their minds (in a EXPLOSIVE way). I then start to wander around my apartment playing with my junk (no, not like that) then a girl (whose player model gets repeated a LOT) gives me my script. My inner voice "the writer " (That's me.)'' says i should read it, but I don't like so my OTHER inner voice "the partier" ('Sup, bitches!) says that I should just make my own. '''Your welcome, I was smart in this! '' '' No you weren't! ''' ' '''Yes I was! Shut up!' No YOU shut up! N''o you! '' I'm gonna put you two on mute now. Any way, I go to some building to capture some creep named Chance White, kill some goons, blow up helicopters, the usual badass stuff. But then Chance gets rescued by the Nasty Boyz AKA the Marauders (total D-Listers am I right?), so I had to chase him across the sewers, killing Arclight in the process, until he gets killed by Mr. Sinister since he didn't need him anymore (apparently they had some plan going, but I never paid attention). I nearly killed that sonuvab*tch, but he cheated by blowing me up the f*ck up. I healed up and met with X-Men who planned to go after Sinister by heading to his base in Genosha, and guess what... I GOT TO FLY THE F*CKING BLACKBIRD!!! Unfortunately, I crashed it and knocked the X-Chumps out. While I was wandering around and wasting some douches, I met up with my good ol' friend Cable. However, he ONCE AGAIN started his usual "I'm here to bring you a dire warning from the future" crap. I wasn't in the mood to hear it, so I blew my head up. When I woke up, Cable left me note about some naked gal who's apparently a fan of mine. But guess what? I got fooled. AGAIN. Anyhoo, Cable told me about Sinister and how he's held up in Magneto's old citadel, but I didn't care and after wasting some douches and accidentally causing a magnetic apocalypse, I finally killed him. But as it turns out, he's a freaking clone! (this gag ended up being repeated a lot, let me tell you) (Apparently, whoever was writing this article was too lazy to do it, but he'll come back later to finish it) Stuff you should know One: WHEN you play this game (there's no "if," you WILL play it), you'd better make me look good. Keep me running, and gaze upon my glorious posterior. I don't want to be sittin' around doin' nothin'! And two: wait, sorry, bathroom break (I'm actually not sorry; I have to piss, BAD). Okay, and TWO: don't compare my game to anyone else's. Like that chump, Spider-Man. (following stuff is false) His newest game SUCKED! Go play it, see! Just kidding, don't. Actually... yeah, no, don't play it. You'll want your money back the minute you look at the cover! It's just horrifying! Same with his newest movie. You know what? Just don't bother with him at all. This is MY Wiki, anyway, right? My game. MY BUSINESS! (Okay, I've heard a lot of people loved his new game but still) At first, my game and DLC was removed from digital storefront on January 2014, for some reasons has to do with Activision's Marvel license limits. However, good news is, they have return to Steam/PC digital storefront on July 15, 2015. :D Even better news, gamers, my game will be ported to Xbox One and Playstation 4 on November 17, 2015 (Next month). Isn't it EXCITING!? Perhaps because of my upcoming movie produced by 20th Fox. Stay tune for the HD remaster port of my game, gamers. ;D If you want to know more, head to my game's website, you're sure to find stuff there that you'll love, like ME! And, you know, all that other stuff. But mainly me. (Editor's note: The website is dead.) How my game works So my game is like this, when there's a few enemies, you can just slice them to pieces with my sword (neat, right?). However, things only get really started when there's tens of thousands of enemies. Instead of slicing them, you need to shoot them with pistols or any other weapon you get with Deadpool Points. There's alot of them in the game, and getting them will allow you to buy weapons (you don't need money, which is SUPER nice). Well, there's a downside to shooting battles. I get damaged a lot during them, and my pajamas (I just got them!) get ripped and fall apart. Even my ass and penis get revealed! So you should probably get out of the way and heal before my healthbar hits zero. Not even the healing factor can save you when that happens. Pre-Order bling If you decide to pre-order my game (who are we kidding - of course you will), some fine establishments who love me as much as I do will offer some nice swaggity bling for you. Best Buy *A $5 voucher for ANY Marvel comic book. You could get one from the time I was in the Uncanny X-Force, or one from Daniel Way's sizzling Deadpool run… And well, yes, I suppose you COULD buy a Marvel comic that DIDN'T star yours truly, but why do that to yourself? Plus also check out my Deadpool Kills series, such as Deadpool Kills The Marvel Universe, Deadpool Killustrated, and Deadpool Kills (Myself) Deadpool. – U.S. only (while supplies last). *An exclusive Deadpool poster for everyone who pre-orders the game from my home country (while supplies last). Vive posters! Vive Quebec! – Canada Only Steam and GameStop download *The Merc with a Map Pack DLC! Featuring two new levels – GRT Plaza and Inside the Tower – for Deadpool Challenge Mode and Infinite Mode, as well as two new costumes, the D-Pooly and Uncanny X-Force suits (only available in Infinite Mode). You like maps, don't you? *Your very own Deadpool digital wallpaper! Look, if you want to be the only one of your friends without a Deadpool digital wallpaper, that's fine. I don't know, I think high school's hard enough already, but it's your choice – you gotta be you. GameStop *In addition to the above: a (drum roll, please) midnight launch party at the GameStop with the most pre-orders (more drums!) paid BY Activision (now the bassoon!) with a LIVE appearance from ME, Das Pool! Now’s your chance, Kodiak, Alaska GameStop customers! – U.S. Only Amazon *A $5 Amazon credit towards select Marvel graphic novels– but seriously... buy a Deadpool graphic novel. An exclusive digital wallpaper and digital coversleeve, because what are you doing not staring at my perfectly sculpted body every waking moment of the day? Reception When this game came out, I prayed that it would get a "Game of the Year" award. But that didn't happen because those GameRankings and Metacritic guys are DICKS! They gave my game an 63/100, when they should have given it an 94/100! My game is like ''Super Mario 64 ''except there's no free roaming, just guns, kills and chimichangas. When I'm done reading what you're writing RIGHT NOW, I'll visit those damn critics and poke their freakin' eyes out! Images ;Characters Arclight.jpg|Arclight "And her D-List pecks". Blockbuster.jpg| Blockbuster . Cable.png|Cable. Domino.png|Domino. DominoPoster.jpg|Domino. Psylocke.png|Psylocke. Sinister.png|Mr. Sinister. Vertigo.jpg|Vertigo "Lamest. Power. Ever." ;Screenshots Screenshot.png Screenshot1.png Screenshot2.png Screenshot3.png Screenshot4.png Screenshot5.png Screenshot6.jpg 64a8c76fd8d666c581cfc76f494c47caf44ab89f_jpg__0x529_q85_upscale.jpg ;Concept art ConceptArt.jpg ConceptArt1.jpg ConceptArt2.jpg deadpool-the-game-xbox-360-1359988677-039.jpg|"Death; my bony muffin, howest long must we be part." CNRPggx.jpg|"Generic.. Uh, I mean 'Genetic' Clones, yeah." YFzMBZc.jpg|"Psyloke, as Sexy as she was back during my run in the X-Force." XLY5NPx.jpg|"Like look'in into a sexy mirror." 4J3wahp.jpg|"Wolverine, AKA: The Furry midget formally known as Wolverine." Domino.jpg|"Domino, baby, if you weren't capable of blowing my head off at a hundred yards with that in insane luck power of your's. You'd never get rid of me." 5.Cable.jpg|"Cable. The most boring cyborg ever devised by man." Videos Deadpool - Gameplay Launch Trailer|Launch Trailer Deadpool (VG) () - Reveal trailer|Reveal Trailer Deadpool The Game - SDCC 2012 Trailer|SDCC 2012 Trailer Deadpool Lead Designer Breaks Down The Game|Lead Designer External links *Official game site Dead link *Deadpool's Blog *Deadpool Twitter *Deadpool Facebook